Submissive Kids Become Shy Adults
If you were one of those kids forced to listen and scared into submission you have probably become a shy adult. When you were younger you thought you were doing the right thing, by always following the rules. Always listening to adults that shut you down and prohibited you from discovering who you are without certain regulations. You did not do the right thing in my opinion, oftentimes those kids grow into adults and end up having to find themselves in adulthood. While the kids who did not behave one day in their lives, know exactly who they are and they're extremely confident. It is not your fault, but it is the truth.
Every time a child or developing teenager was told they spoke too much. Their ideas are too farfetched, when simple things like expressions with their hair or anything physical belonging to them are frowned upon, their growth is stunted. It's kind of like when you have those adults who excessively drink and party because they did not have a chance to party in their youth. Obviously, I'm not referring to excessive teenage drinking, but I mean teenagers being able to go out and interact with other teenagers within a safe space. You also see cases like this with girls who have restrictions when it comes to how they dress or come from a very religious background. Some of these girls tend to be the biggest hoes in adulthood.
The religious aspect can be a bit touchy because I believe if the restrictions are done properly, it does not create a lot of reason for them to think that the grass is greener on the other side. But I have come to find from my experience with people who had great restrictions applied to them, they tend to be yearning for freedom and it manifests itself in overindulgence in those freedoms. Kids who are told they talk too much, sometimes turn out to be adults who are too shy to give a presentation in college. Maybe that talkative charismatic personality is what they needed later in life. But it was killed before it got to develop properly.
Being too fearful of repercussions from your parents or authority figures really will stunt you. Personally speaking, you might not even know how to regulate your emotions. Because you were holding them in. Then you find yourself in adulthood trying to regain your identity because the whole time you survived on morphing into a character that kept you safe. In my opinion, it is not good for children to be overly submissive. Don't be the first child, be the second child. There is a running joke that the first child in a family is always scared to do things, while the second child of the family is very rebellious and does whatever they want. I agree with this, do what you must do to represent yourself in your youth.
Mary